Category Archives: Self – help

Winding down 2015

imagesIt’s that time of the year when we are looking back at the year to see how it has been, the gains, the losses, the wins, the failures and the memories we were able to create. Indeed, it just happens by default that as we are winding down the year, we tend to start focusing on the introspection. Have you ever thought of doing this at the end of every month? Do you think your year would end up differently? There must be a reason why corporations look at their balance sheets month to month – we all take part in that if you work for a company. Why have you never thought of implementing it in your own life?

We all make our resolutions for the new year, but it is equally important to make sure you are on track with those resolution. As we all know, 90% of the resolutions made are never followed through. That’s why you see the gym full of people from January to February end and then it goes back to the regular people because most people cannot stay on track.

It is great to have the intention to change, however in order for change to happen there needs to be a mental shift. If you knew how to bring about the change, you would have done it by now. So to do things differently, you need to think differently. That means you need to program your mind differently and for that you need to seek out knowledge. I recently did series of 10 videos on Success Mindset Tips that talks about various processes you can follow, some books and also suggested. You can check it out at

Success takes work and it takes a conscious effort. Do not let another year go by with the same work ethic and thinking. Be open to change, be willing to listen and learn. Here is wishing you all a great 2016!

Keep learning, keep growing!

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Success Mindset Video Series

More and more people are learning through videos and it is a great way to share with you 10 success mindset tips leading up to the new year. Every day I will share with you one video to help you off to a great start for 2016.

So here is the first one coming at you:

Success Mindset Tip # 1


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Do you have the vision for a vision board?


With a year coming to an end, I figured it is a great time to talk about the vision for 2016. If you are serious about changing things for better in the coming year, then you probably have already started jotting down things you would like to accomplish and a plan to get there. If you are someone who is dead serious about setting goals, then you probably have done this with you mentor or guide to the minutest details, because all successful people have mentors. Either way, by now you should be ready with your list of goals for 2016. My suggestion to you would be do not just put goals, be very specific of what you want to get and if possible get an immense clarity on how exactly that would happen.

Our subconscious mind works in pictures and the more you are able to feed the sub conscious mind with pictures, the more it is able to channelize your thoughts and actions towards the image. Hence a great way to embed the goals in your mind would be through visual depiction, which in turn would be a vision board. Vision boards can be a powerful (and fun) tool to help your aspirations and goals become more REAL and tangible. The visual imagery allows you to more readily see yourself living your dream, as if it were already reality. We may think about what we want often, but it has a far greater impact than vague wishing. Making a vision board can be a fun and visual way of keeping your dreams in mind every day.
What is a vision board?

A vision board is a paper with a collage of images on it. Most usually consist of magazine images cut out and applied to a piece of paper. The purpose of a vision board is to help bring your dreams and aspirations to your life but also have a visual reminder of the same.  It is a creative opportunity to create your dreams on paper as a means of bringing them more tangibly into your life, a 3-D focal point for your meaningful life and vision.
Vision boards can be:
Fun: a real pleasure to see your future in vivid color as if it already existed
Meaningful: keeps you “feeling” your dreams
Unique/Custom: specific and clear focus
Inspiring: helps you believe you CAN do it
Powerful Visual Cues: for your subconscious and conscious mind to process and work on

How to show abstract concepts?

You can one single goal or a bunch of them, there are no rules on how many goals you can have. Not all goals need to be literally included on the board. The images and words just REPRESENT what you want – they serve as a placeholder for your actual items. Distill the concepts down to tangible images. Be specific of what you want and source the images accordingly. Saying you want a “better” relationship is too vague. Do you want a more affectionate relationship? Show a picture of a couple hugging. Pay attention to how you feel.
The pictures you put needs to come from your heart, they should move you when you look at them. It doesn’t matter so much what the picture shows, it really matters how YOU feel when you look at it. If it gives you a good feeling that is in line with your intention, use it! If one of the images is supposed to represent “success” but every time you look at it your tummy tightens a bit, find another image. I can’t say this strongly enough: Don’t force the board down too narrow of a path. If you are too strict in exactly what the image includes, it may not accurately represent your vision. The FEELING of what you want is far more powerful than the image itself.

Not yet clear on your goals, but ready to do a vision board anyway?
Absolutely! There is no reason to wait. If you aren’t sure exactly what you want but you do know want more joy in your life, find images that make you feel joyful or that represent joy to you. Perhaps you fill your board with pictures of fields of yellow flowers, people dancing, or smiling faces. Maybe you haven’t been feeling well and feel hazy on your goals but know you want to feel healthier. You can create a vision board full of healthy, active, vibrant people surrounded in colors that make you feel uplifted. The specific images don’t really matter, but your emotions and your intentions do. Take the dream interview to help get more insights.
Seeing yourself on the vision board in the images makes a huge impact. You can take an image of someone doing things that you want to do,print that image out from the computer, put it up on the board and paste a picture of your face over theirs. It instantly makes that dream seem more.

Where are good places to get pictures? 

Magazines are the easiest source of colorful material. You can collect them from friends, save your own, or buy old ones from your local library. Vary the types of magazines you get so you have enough variety in topics and pictures to choose from.
The Internet is also a great place to get free pictures for your board. In addition to regular sites, you can also go to image source websites such as or Getty Images. They allow you to search by type of image (photo or cartoon, women or men, indoor or outdoor, even on themes like “confidence”), so you can really be quite particular. Copy and paste them into a document, drag them to create the size you want, then print them out.
If you want more money in your future, you can use the checks from the “Bank of the Universe” from the website for the movie, The Secret. Keeping in line with the concept of manifesting, we don’t need to know all of the exact “hows” of where this money will come from, just that the world is full of abundance. Along with pictures you can also have some motivational quotes.

Have fun. Don’t worry about doing it “right,” as long as you know your intentions and are clear on your goals, you are fine. You can even have some friends over to share magazines and have a vision board party!
Enjoy the process and create a vision board you love looking at. The powerful visual reminder of your dreams and goals truly will help you focus on them more — and look forward to making them happen. Your unique board, combined with your heartfelt intentions and effort, helps make your dreams come true.

Make 2016 count for you and your goals!


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Can you count on yourself?


How many times have you made New Year resolution of losing weight and have not been able to accomplish it? How many times have you made the decision to love more, laugh more etc and not able to keep to your promise? Why is it that we are so motivated and determined to get the job done while making resolution and then cannot follow through? Is it because of the following?

  • We lack self discipline
  • We lack motivation
  • We make decisions when we are at an emotional high and then as the high wears off, the decision to stick to it also wears off
  • We have no one to answer for our resolutions?

No matter what the reasons are, the point remains that we could not keep up to our own words. One of the main reasons why people fail to succeed is because they do not hold themselves accountable for their own words. This is coupled by the lack of discipline and consistency that one needs to be successful. Too many of us want to be successful, however do not want to go through the rigour of what it takes to be successful. I wish there was one pill that can be taken and the transformation happens. Unfortunately it does not work that way.

Some months back, I was in a similar situation. I have always been an athlete and enjoyed sports. However, with growing responsibilities and lack of determination, I was slacking when it came to my personal health. I had enough reasons to justify why I could not find the time and each of them were very valid. No matter what I told to others, the fact remained that I knew the real truth. It is not that I did not want it, maybe I did not want it bad enough. It was bothersome to me but had not reached the stage of annoyance. It was like a dog sitting on a nail, however the pain was not so bad that the dog wanted to get up and find another place to sit.

As days passed, I was realizing the fact that I was just fooling myself and I needed to do something about it soon. I would start working out for a couple of days and then not do work the rest of the week. I was not able to discipline myself to get into a daily habit. There was no lack of knowledge; there sure was lack of discipline. Then one day – it just happened like I was stuck by a lightening or something. I just decided – enough is enough and I am going to put a stop to this. Then the next step I took was in my opinion – the best thing I could do to myself. I not only started my first workout but I dared to write a post about it with a self inflicted goal of sticking through it for the next 60 days. I always knew that if I claimed it boldly, I will have to stick to it. I am not yet done my 60 days – but I can tell you that the transformation is so encouraging. Not only have i transformed, but I have been able to motivate so many of my friends into it and it feels great.

So here are my suggestions to make sure how you can achieve your goals:

Dare to show PDA (personal display of accountability) – Claim your goals boldly and share it with the people who matter to you and who care for your well being. Get an accountability partner, someone who will push you. You can even do it on Face book, or any social media platform. This is what will force you to stick to the plan as you will have to be accountable.

Set a time limit – A goal without a deadline is just a wish list. So it is imperative that you set a timeline to achieve the goal. Set the timeline and forget about it and just focus on the activity.

Don’t look for perfection – Do a little bit every day, take one day at a time.  It is okay to not be perfect, but make sure you do the work which will take you closer to your goal EVERYDAY.

Review and tweak – If you keep doing the work without reviewing, you might end up at the wrong end. When you use an axe to cut a tree, you need to stop and sharpen it too in order for you to get maximum results. This is no different. You need to review your work to check for any tweaking that might be needed.

Celebrate small wins – In order to stay motivated to the goal, we need to see some victories along the way. Take the time to celebrate success, even if they are small. This will help you to stay upbeat and wanting to do more.

Everyone loves the success but very few take the time to find out what it takes to be successful. If we could do what successful people have done, then we can be there too. One of the biggest attribute of being successful is to be accountable to your words – to your own words before to anyone else. The above mentioned pointers have helped me stay on course and I am sure if you are able to follow it diligently, there is no reason why it will not help you too.


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How often do you listen to your gut?

brain-544412_640Gut – a very powerful organ in our body that drives our healthy quotient. They say that most root causes of diseases starts from your gut. So I guess quite an important part of our healthy living. You would think, given the fact that it is such an important part, we would pay more attention. Do you really?

I know you are probably wondering what on earth is an article on guts doing to a business audience; especially when most of the readers who are smart, intellectual, accomplished, and knows how to make right decisions? Trust me; I am not deviating from business topic here.  I know in business numbers speak and they never lie and show us a pattern but can you really get passed the feeling in your gut when making a crucial decision. Some of you could be highly accomplished executives or business owners who are blessed with a superb analytical brain and can read everything through numbers, but you can never defy the feeling of your guts.

Most accomplished entrepreneur has taken decisions based on their gut feeling and more often than not it has always turned out to be in the right direction. Of course you cannot ignore the importance of numbers, but there is something about the “hunch”. However, you would largely find senior business executive always tries to base their decisions off crunched numbers. Not sure why that happens, maybe it is the lack of risk taking ability when compared to an entrepreneur. What are you really afraid to lose –  the hefty package, the bonuses, the health benefits, the Harry Rosen suit and the swanky automobile?

Have you ever measured it against the joy of taking the risk and enjoying the success of the decision? Maybe it is worth giving a thought. Think rich, think different.

A Ted Ex video on the same topic just opened my eyes on the huge possibilities that we all can miss out just because we are scared to listen to our gut feel. I hope that the video showcased here, gives you the same belief as it has given me to know that it is OK to listen to your gut at times.


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Learning to unlearn

learn_bayt_medMore than ever in the history of mankind, the time is now to feed your hunger for learning – that is if you even have a hunger for learning. The overflowing information through the digital world has made it easy for all of us to accumulate as much knowledge on any subject of your choice as possible. Technology has truly revolutionized the art of learning.

Today I watch my 11-year-old son, downloading Photoshop, dream weaver, and much other software and sitting for hours and maneuvering his mind and imaginative senses to understand, comprehend and then put it into practice to come up with creative expressions. We as parents take pride in our children who display a larger than comprehensive talent, however, when it comes to us, so few of us are ready to take advantage of the same technology that is equally available to us. Should you make the effort to unlearn so you can learn? Here are some statistics for you to give it a good thought:

  • Adult education experts estimate that up to 40% of what tertiary students are learning will be obsolete a decade henceforth when they are  working in jobs that have yet to be created.
  • The top 10 most in-demand jobs today didn’t even exist 10 years ago.
  • By 2020, there will be more people over 65 years old than under age 15 in the world’s developed countries.

We live in a changing world understates the speed of both the pace and the scope of ongoing change. To add to this the social changes in family structure, the globalization of talent, and continued innovation in technology. It is hard to imagine just what the world, and it’s increasingly mobile workforce will look like 20 years from now. Certainly, nothing like it looked twenty years ago!

For the three-plus billion people in the workforce, it’s not just about keeping up with the rate of change and the nature of the work we do, but how we do it and where. When anyone can work from anywhere, it changes the nature of work everywhere. Traditional boundaries disappear, and the global talent pool becomes more skilled and mobile, which presents a challenge for people in developed countries to adapt faster to stay competitive. Your ability to adapt to changing face and proactively make changes in your career is what will make a crucial difference to where you find yourself even just five years from now. To quote Mr.  Darwin: ”It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change.”

We are all born with an intense desire to learn, somewhere along the line many of us lose our passion for learning. The pressure to excel in school with its ever-pressing emphasis on test scores can rob the enjoyment from the process of learning. Whatever the reasons, once the basics are covered, many people tend to stick with what they know and avoid situations or challenges where they may mess up or be forced to learn something new, thus creating a safe, secure and comfortable (and confining) world for themselves. Most say they’re open to change, but actually do their best to avoid it. It’s time you wake up and smell the coffee.

Learning agility is the name of the game. Where the rules are changing fast, your ability to be agile in letting go of old rules and learning new ones is increasingly important. Learning agility is the key to unlocking your change proficiency and succeeding in an uncertain, unpredictable and constantly evolving environment, both personally and professionally. There are countless things you may have to unlearn in your job, business and career, even throughout  the next 12 months.

  • Unlearn the designs you use.
  • Unlearn the methodology you use.
  • Unlearn the technology you use.
  • Unlearn the way you approach your brand.
  • Unlearn the way you communicate your value.
  • Unlearn the way you deliver your value.
  • Unlearn the skills and knowledge needed to get to the next level.
  • Unlearn who your target market is, what they want and why.
  • Unlearn how to get the most from your employees.

Unlearning is about moving away from something—letting go—rather than acquiring. It’s like stripping old paint. It lays the foundation for the new layer of fresh learning to be acquired and to stick. However, like the painter who needs to prepare a surface, stripping the paint is 70% of the work while repainting is only 30%.

As the global economy evolves and market forces drive competition for jobs to new levels, it’s the people who have proactively worked to expand and diversify their skill sets that will be the best placed. The New York Times columnist Tom Friedman wrote, ‘Everyone had to bring something extra; being average is no longer enough. Everyone is looking for employees who critical thinking and problem solving can do, just to get an interview. What they are really looking for is people who can invent, re-invent and re-engineer their jobs while doing them.’

People who find opportunities in a changing environment are those who are actively looking for them. The choice is simple: act or be acted upon. Since change is the only constant, you can truly rely upon, learning to navigate and adapt to it is not just important to your survival, it’s essential for you to thrive in the bigger game of life.

As futurist and philosopher Alvin Toffler once wrote: “The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.” Think about it – think rich, think different.

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Why don’t we teach to chase failures?

Failure – it is such a hard word for us to swallow. We are always resisting failures and why we shouldn’t – failure-success-360x200it does not make us happy or give any sense of accomplishment. For some, going through a failure is the end of the world. We are all so programmed to be success conscious all the time that going through failure can be really detrimental. Most of us do not know how to handle failures in life; some of us wallow in self-pity, lose self-confidence, have low self-image and the list can go on and on. If one does not get help at the right time, it could completely mess up their whole life.

How does one get to success without failures? I am yet to understand that. Why is failing such a big deal – if someone wanted everything to be perfect in their lives, do they understand that  this privilege is only of the person who is buried six feet under  the earth, in another way someone who is  dead. I think if you read or listen to most successful people, all of them will tell you that they are where they are because they have made more mistakes in their lives. I believe, if you are a person who is scared of failure, you are not a risk taker. This is because you are afraid of rejections. If this is your trait, then you can never be an entrepreneur. Period!

Whether be it a day today living or in corporate and business environments – we are conditioned to measure our success. For example, the success of a sales person is measured by how many deals he is able to bring in. Have you ever thought – what it would be like, if you were to switch the dynamics? Instead of counting how many successful calls, flip the measure to the most number of rejections a person went through in the day. You will be amazed to see how magical the results would be. By doing this, not only have you have taken away the fear of failure, but also given people the permission to fail and be applauded for it. Try doing this and watch the magic happen in your sales team.

Learn from your failure. Every failure is an opportunity for you to learn. A great resource on this is the book by John Maxwell “Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.”  Take the risk, try new things, and unlearn to learn because it is OK to make mistakes.

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Persistently Persistent

We have always heard this – slow and steady wins the race. From the story of the race between tortoise and hare and so many more examples given to us. I think it is time to defy that adage and tweak it a bit to achieve success. In my opinion, it is not slow and steady but fast and steady who wins the race. The world and technology are changing so rapidly, so are the learnings and ways of doing business. If you work at a slow and steady pace, you are never going to make it. You need to have a steady pace backed by consistent and persistent work ethic. As easy as it sounds, it is that much difficult to have the discipline to keep on keeping on.

If you are one of the people who believes you need no motivation to succeed, and you are self motivated, you are in for a big fall. Life happens to all of us, and we need to find resources that will keep you motivated so you can put in the consistent and persistent work. We have our highs, and we have our lows; we have things that get us distracted from the task in hand, or it could be just sheer laziness. Whatever the reason might be; we need a system in place much like the GPS we use for our cars to keep us on track.

Here are some ways I have been able to keep my fire up and come back with a bigger resolve every time life happened to me, or I slipped in my work ethic:

Association –you will need to surround yourself with people where you want to be. I hope you understand that these people are not going to come to you and invite you to hang out with them. You need to seek them out. Be it forms of seminars, online or at networking event; you need to find a way to get closer to them. As you get the opportunity to mingle with them, observe and learn. Watch how they talk, behave, what is their thought process, how they are handling situations? I have learned so much by just keeping an open mind, listening and taking notes.

Reading – This is in my opinion the biggest tool you can have in your hand and the most under rated. I am sure you spend enough money on yourself to look good, smell good and not to forget to eat well too. How about the three-pound brain that can give you all the things you are looking for in your life. How much do you spend on that? Do you realize there is not much difference between a ditch digger and a successful entrepreneur from the neck down? It is another story if we consider neck up. So feed that brain with good books and information. I can list out a ton of books but one book that you must have in your collection is Think and Grow Rich by Napole0n Hill

Faith – I know some of you are probably already raising your eyebrows on this sub head, but you need to be spiritually aligned to a higher power. I am not here to preach you or sermon you, but you need to have an unshakable faith. The faith in yourself will only come when you have faith in a higher power and know that universe is aligning itself to make things happen for you. Higher faith results in higher emotional stability which is critical element in achieving success. A great book that has really helped me is Magic by Rhonda Byrne

Disciplined Work Ethic – haven gotten the ability to watch successful people from close proximity, I can tell you that they are disciplined in every area of their lives. You need to be disciplined about your health, your habits, your work ethic, your spends, etc. as everything is interlinked. Without a proper road map, you cannot succeed. You need to be disciplined to work your plan EVERYDAY, I mean everyday without fail. Happiness is in the process of accomplishing and not the final accomplishment. When you are disciplined and follow your plan, there is no way you will not be succeeding and motivated.

Self Talk – Pay attention to what you talk to yourself. Get the book What to say when you talk to yourself by Shad Hemlstetter. It is a book that will teach you the power of self-talk. It has personally helped me a lot in staying upbeat and motivated.

Persistency can definitely be developed; we need to find people who show great persistency and spend time with them; we need to understand what it is that drives them to keep going. From my personal experience, I know that some of my own persistence comes from having experienced success through not giving in, so clearly persistence and success are a self-feeding cycle. The more we persist, the more we will be successful and the more belief we will have in persistence. So we only need to start the circle, we can either do this through our own innate determination or stubbornness, or we can work alongside someone who has it and learn it from them.

One way or another, in order to be successful we need to develop persistence.

LEAF-CUTTER ANT with leaf Atta sp. Amazonian Rainforest, Loreto, Peru
LEAF-CUTTER ANT with leaf Atta sp. Amazonian Rainforest, Loreto, Peru
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Do you have a reference point?


4156-4b6ab1d7077d5b3ecf879bf63a69ec6fAs the month is drawing to a close, my heart is sinking. I wish time would go by slowly, and August  would never end. The reason being, our daughter is heading off to University on the first week of September. She will now have to live on her own and far away from us. I know she is probably so excited about her new journey and the chance to be away from home. We as parents, especially a “mom” cannot stop worrying about our children.

The more I think of it, the more my heart sinks and dollops of tears swell up in my eyes. I am fighting very hard to not get emotional as I am penning down my thoughts even now. It is just too many memories, too much time spent together and the amazing bond we share. I cannot imagine my house without my girl – she, and I are like long lost friends to whom I can open up my heart and talk without being ever judged. So you see, it is one of the hardest things I am fighting with. As I spent few days getting emotional and crying my heart out, I saw a post from one of my friends who lives in India on Facebook. The post was about her daughter who studies in USA wishing her well for the upcoming year.

Suddenly, I felt so small. Here I was, living in Costa Rica and getting all emotional about my daughter going back to Canada for her studies, which is a few hour’s flight, and on the other hand, I see a person who is miles apart putting up a brave front. I reached out to her and expressed myself and thanked her for giving me strength. Her response to my message just blew me apart. Suddenly, my reference point changed.  Up until now, I was only thinking of my friends who live in Canada, and their kids were going to Universities in Canada. Hence, to me my challenge seemed way bigger. In other words, my reference point was so small. As soon as my reference point shifted, I could handle my situation way better.

Whether we are consciously aware of them or not, we all have reference points.  These points dictate what we do in our life and who we become.  We have reference points for every area of our existence.  They are what we look up to and what guides us.  These reference points play a very critical role in shaping our path or towards fulfilling our own destiny. Our mind is so much more capable than what we think. The only difference between a successful person and who is not is the way they think and act.

The key to increasing your performance, in whatever area it might be, is to alter your reference points.  You want better grades in school?  Don’t study for a C+ or a B, study for an A.  You want to be in better shape?  Work out to have the best body, not just enough to get by.  You see; most people simply want to “get by.”  This is why they struggle along that line.  For example, people that make an insane amount of money have a vastly different reference point than people just getting by when it comes to money.  Success is all about having greater reference points.  There is a big difference between someone who just wants a job to make some money and someone who wants to be rich.  The point of reference is what can help you unravel this enigma.

If you want to be successful and want to create massive changes within your life, you have to change what is acceptable to you.  Increase the threshold to a level where you will experience enormous improvements.  Alter what is considered OK for you and aim higher.  People that lose weight or stop smoking dramatically are people that have drastically changed their reference points.  No longer is it acceptable for them to be out of shape and in poor health.  They now have a point of reference that challenges them to be that much better.  It is via changing what you are comfortable with and what is acceptable to you that you will achieve significant milestones within your existence.

Change your reference, change your life!



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